Maybe It's Time We Normalize Talking to Ourselves
What if talking to your past self, future self, or even your own body isn't crazy at all? This thought-provoking article challenges society's definition of "normal," explores the power of self-reflection and intuition, and encourages you to reconnect with the one person who has been with you every moment of your life—you.
SAFE FREEDOM™
Bianca (Ocean) Maria Desmore
7/10/20265 min read


People laugh when someone says they talk to their past self or future self. Apparently that's "crazy." But somehow, talking to an invisible, all-powerful being in the sky has been considered completely normal for thousands of years. Interesting, isn't it? Before anybody gets their pitchforks out, I'm not attacking anyone's beliefs. Believe whatever brings you peace. My point is much simpler than that. Who decided that talking to yourself became something to be ashamed of? Because I think we've gotten this one completely backward.
I have no scientific proof that your future self is literally answering you. I can't hook electrodes up to your brain and say, "Yep...that was definitely Future You calling." What I can tell you is this: some of the greatest breakthroughs in my life happened because I finally became quiet enough to listen to myself. Not social media. Not experts. Not family. Not society. Myself. Somewhere along the way, we decided that intuition was suspicious, imagination was childish, curiosity was dangerous, and talking to ourselves meant something was wrong. I don't buy it.
Society has an incredible track record of making fun of people right before discovering they were right. Remember when people hugged trees? They were mocked. People rolled their eyes. "They've lost it." Fast-forward a couple of decades, and researchers have found that spending time in nature can lower stress, improve mood, reduce cortisol, and even support immune function. Forest bathing—yes, that's an actual thing—is being studied all over the world. Spending time around trees appears to calm the nervous system and improve overall well-being. Funny how that works. First you're weird. Then you're interesting. Then you're evidence-based.
I've watched this pattern repeat over and over. Meditation. Breathwork. Cold exposure. Mindfulness. Gratitude. All things that sounded ridiculous to a lot of people until science started catching up. So maybe—just maybe—we've been dismissing a few other things too quickly. One of those things is having conversations with ourselves.
And I don't mean standing in your kitchen arguing with the toaster. I mean intentionally asking yourself questions that nobody else can answer. Questions like, "What brought me here?" "When did I first start believing this?" "What does my body need today?" "What would Future Me want me to do right now?" Those are powerful questions, not because they're magical, but because they force your brain to search for information it normally ignores.
If you've followed my work on The Chain Creation Theory™, you already know I believe our first experiences create patterns that quietly influence our decisions for years. So if you're battling an addiction, repeating the same relationship, or sabotaging every opportunity that comes your way, why not ask your younger self, "What happened?" Then sit quietly. Seriously. Just wait. Maybe nothing happens. Great. You lost five minutes. But maybe you remember a moment you'd forgotten. Maybe an image pops into your mind. Maybe you hear your own inner voice connecting dots that have been disconnected for decades. That's worth five minutes.
Your brain stores memories in remarkable ways. A smell, a song, a photograph, or a simple question can unlock experiences you haven't thought about in years. We already know memory works like that. So why wouldn't thoughtful self-reflection uncover something meaningful?
Now let's make this even weirder. Talk to your body. I do. If my shoulders hurt, I ask them what's going on. If I'm exhausted, I ask my body what it's trying to tell me. Do I believe my liver starts speaking English? No. But I do believe something incredible happens when we stop treating our bodies like machines and start paying attention to them. Research in psychology and neuroscience supports the idea of interoception—our ability to notice and interpret signals coming from inside the body. The more aware people become of those internal signals, the better they often become at regulating emotions, recognizing stress early, and making healthier decisions. In other words, listening to your body isn't mystical. It's a real part of how humans self-regulate. Maybe your stomach isn't "talking." Maybe your nervous system is finally being heard. That's different.
I also think we underestimate how healing self-compassion can be. Imagine saying this out loud: "I'm proud of you." Not to your child. Not to your spouse. To yourself. When was the last time you genuinely thanked yourself for surviving everything you've survived? When was the last time you looked in the mirror and simply said, "You did good"? Most of us wouldn't dream of speaking to another person the way we speak to ourselves. That's heartbreaking. We've been trained to become our own worst critics. Maybe it's time to become our own safest place instead.
Go outside. Take a deep breath—not the kind where you're already thinking about your grocery list, but an actual breath. Look at the clouds. Watch a butterfly. Smile because a ladybug landed on your arm. Pick up the interesting rock. Seriously. Get excited. Remember being a kid? Everything was fascinating. A stick became a sword. A cardboard box became a spaceship. A puddle became an adventure. Nothing changed except us. Society slowly convinced us that wonder was childish, that excitement was embarrassing, and that curiosity should be replaced with productivity. What a terrible trade.
I think we need to return to being human. Not perfect. Not optimized. Human. Talk to yourself. Talk to your younger self. Ask your future self what decision would make tomorrow easier. Congratulate yourself for making it this far. Forgive yourself for not knowing then what you know now. Whether those conversations come from your subconscious, your imagination, your intuition, or something science hasn't fully explained yet, honestly doesn't concern me nearly as much as the outcome. Are you becoming kinder to yourself? More aware? More present? More honest? If the answer is yes, keep talking.
And if nothing happens? Well, you lost a few minutes having a peaceful conversation with yourself. I'd call that a pretty safe experiment. But if something does happen—if a memory surfaces, if clarity arrives, if you finally understand why you've been carrying the same burden for years—then a whole new world of possibilities just opened.
I have spent my life asking questions that other people were afraid to ask. Some of those questions eventually led me to earn degrees. Some led me to The Chain Creation Theory™. Some completely changed my life. So I'll leave you with one more question. What if the person you've been searching for has been trying to talk to you all along?
And before somebody misunderstands me, no, asking your future self for advice does not make you insane. As long as you don't order two dinners at a restaurant, pour your future self a glass of wine, and introduce your past self to your date, then we might need a different conversation. Until then, go have a chat with yourself. You might be surprised by how much you already know.
